Modern Magi

I recently reread O. Henry's "The Gift of the Magi".  If you've never read this short story stop reading this and go here to read this story.  I read for the first time in elementary school I think, and I don't believe I've ever read it since then until now.  It's funny how the effect of an event is directly related to where you are in life.  I can remember vaguely being touched by Della's and Jim's situation and the outcome of their affection for each other. However, upon a fresh look it has a totally different impact on me.  I'm still touched by these characters, but now I've the appreciation of a man who's been married almost 15 years.  I have experienced times in a 500 square foot apartment.  I been out job hunting with no real prospects while my wife was in a college class.  I don't say any of this to depict deep suffering.  God always provided.  God always provides.  But my empathy for these characters is now genuine.

One dollar and 87 cents.  That number has new meaning to me.  It now represents the catalyst that leads a person to give in to the foolish idea that happiness, even happiness for someone other than self, can be bought.  To the contemporaries of Henry, one dollar and 87 cents must have sounded like a pitiful amount of money.  By today's standards it's laughable.  I can scarcely buy a half a gallon of gasoline for that amount.  I can just afford a soda at the grocery store.  Disposable.  That's how most would view it.  And yet this small amount of money became the a watershed moment for Della.  She became desperate as she fixated on it because she was so sure that she couldn't be happy vicariously with that amount being all she had to spend.

Have you read the story yet?  Last chance.  Click HERE and read it before you go on.

Della thought that she need more than $1.87 to bring joy to her husband Jim.  She felt that so strongly that she was willing to go to an extreme in order to procure more.  What's so funny and touching is that her motivations are not disingenuous.  She isn't secretly hoping that she will find a gift for Jim that is so good that he'll reciprocate with something even better out of naked obligation.  She just wants, more than anything, to make Jim happy.  THIS is what will make Della happy.  Her sacrifice was pure in nature.

Psalm 63.1 says, "O God, you are my God; earnestly I seek you; my soul thirsts for you".

As a Christian, I too thirst for a closer walk with my God.  I want so badly sometimes to just do the thing that will make him happy.  I don't always know what that thing is.  Sometimes I try to figure it out.  I'll spend time during my morning run trying to figure just what that one thing is.  I come up with all kinds of ideas.  God, let me start a website for you that will help people draw closer to you by having access to really great theological resources all in one place.  God, let me write a worship song that will allow myself and others to worship you more perfectly.  God, let me organize the perfect family gathering this weekend so my children will experience you and then never turn away.  LORD, let me build you a temple.  God replies in his word that those are all great ideas, but. . .

But before I give him a chance to reveal anything to me, I'm already pooling my resources and seeing what needs to be done in order to make "God's plans" reality.  I realize that these things will take sacrifice in order to make them happen - sacrifice of time; sacrifice of talent; maybe sacrifice of money.  And I'm willing.  I just want to make my God happy.

Della just wanted to make Jim happy.  She was sure that she couldn't do it with $1.87.  So she sold her hair to buy him an expensive watch chain.  She got $20 for her hair - more than 10 times what she had before.  She also bought what should have been the perfect present.  What could possibly go wrong?

I've organized events for my family before.  Prepared what should have been the perfect atmosphere for God to be experienced in a life-changing way for my family and myself.  What could possibly go wrong?


"Peter said to Jesus, 'Master, it is good that we are here. Let us make three tents, one for you and one for Moses and one for Elijah'" (Luke 9:33 ESV).  What could be wrong with that?

The problem in all three of these scenarios is that they all leave out something vital - knowledge from an eternal source about what would actually be best.

Della lacked the knowledge that Jim had sold the very watch she bought his beautiful chain to go on in order to purchase her a set of ornate combs for her long beautiful hair.  She actually had had in her possession along with her $1.87 everything she needed to make Jim happy.  But she gave that up in ignorance.

Peter wanted to honor Jesus in an amazing moment when his glory was being revealed to his disciples in the transfiguration (Luke 9), by building some tents for Jesus, Moses and Elijah.  When all he really needed to do to honor Jesus in that moment was bask in the presence of his deity.

I have often tried to create for the Creator, when in reality he has never asked me to do so.  I have tried to offer gifts like a Modern Magi.  I eagerly spend up time and talent to "create" what should be amazing by my standards, when God was already prepared to truly create greatness with what I already had.  My $1.87 was always enough.  No, not really.  Really nothing at all was always enough for God to do something amazing through me.  Scripture teaches us that all of our world was created from nothing.  Why would he need something from me?  It is only my own pomposity that would think I have anything (even my buck eighty-seven) to bring to the table.  God gives talents, but he already knows what he wants to do with them.  I don't!

My happiness is wrapped up in pleasing God.  I was created to do nothing more.  When I'm living for God as a husband, father, pastor - whatever, I'm happy.  Why would I ever try to add my own spin to that?  It never leads to happiness.  I only arrive at frustration when I try.  My happiness can't be bought with the bartering of my talents and resources for ventures I deem right for God's glory.  My happiness, my eternal joy has already been provided in abundance through the work and activity God daily places in my life.  Yes, I'll still make long range plans.  Yes, I'll still put together a calendar of events for the ministry of the church I serve.  But I will not let these things become MY things.  I'll try to never separate myself from the knowledge of God's work in me daily.  I will never think that I must do BIG things in order to please a big God.  He isn't impressed, nor is he going to be.  He simply wants my adoration - in everything I do.

My eternal journey is about seeking God.  Every ounce of energy given to me by him, every breath he places in my lungs, everything is meant to be used seeking an ever closer walk with him.  Through that daily pursuit I will find myself not merely discovering where God wants to use me, but find that I'm already being used for his purpose.

Father, help me be silent.  Help me listen for your voice in my daily worship of your greatness.  Help me see how you are using me in my daily walk.  Guide my gaze so that I never attempt to guide it myself.  I fail when I endeavor to take control.  I ask that you never give me so much freedom that I would pull away from your presence even for a moment.  I believe, but please help my unbelief.  In Jesus' name,  Amen.